Ramblings of a 30 something, navigating her way through this crazy world.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Am I Facebook shallow?

Weird title, I know, but that is kind of how I feel lately. I'm a very complicated, layered person. I think this clip from Donkey describes it best.

Most people who know me socially think I'm a very outgoing, happy-go-lucky type of person and a lot of the time, I am. But, over the last 5 or 6 years, I've gone through some things that have not hardened me, but have made me more cautious. I'm not as likely to just bound into a party full throttle and become the center of attention. I need to feel comfortable around everyone before I start shedding those layers, to the real Ashley.

So...back to the title...the last few times I've posted on Facebook, the posts have been so shallow, stupid inconsequential rant. Example - last post was about a cocktail dress with pockets. Really?!?! Do all of my Facebook friends need to know that? And maybe that's the point of Facebook? I don't know?

I don't want to put stuff out there for everyone to see, those that I don't let see all the layers. There's really no need for that. I actually hate when people do that...put these open-ended, passive aggressive posts out there just to get a reaction or sympathy from people. That's not my style...that's so Ashley 10 years ago. I can remember putting stuff like that on my AIM away message. Yes, I am that old. I would put up some passive aggressive away message to elicit some sort of "poor Ashley" response. In my mind...super childish. That's what I don't want Facebook to be to me. Hence, this post.

But then...sneaky passive aggressive Ashley tries to sneak in, posting things to get attention, or more importantly some one's attention. Do I really think that some one's view of me will change or be enhanced by what I post on Facebook? Doubtful.

Like I said before...I'm layered. I don't think Facebook is a place for me to peel those layers back, but this blog might just be. I'm pretty sure the only person that reads this is my friend Candace, and she definitely knows the layered Ashley! So, this should be a safe place for me to put my thoughts out there and not feel censored or shy or scared. This is me. If you don't like it, stop reading. If you want to know more, just ask!

That's all my fried brain can come up with this boring Friday afternoon. I'm going to try and post more soon. More as a cathartic outlet than for riveting reading, but nonetheless, I'm going to try and be more consistent. Lots of things going on, which I have a ton to say about and maybe some changes, too. We'll see.

I'll leave you with one more clip. It might be one of my favorite lines from an animated movie. It reminds me of my basset hound, Bailey. I like that boulder.